3 Reasons Why Your Child Doesn’t Talk To You
Father and son relationships vary in each family. Many parents would like to know what is the secret to having a great communication with their little ones. The truth there is no secret, it is only about learning to communicate . Perhaps the reason your child does not talk to you is because you have simply ignored him or because you have not known how to bond with him correctly.
Forget the advice of your friendships . They may have good intentions, but no one knows your child better than you do. Here are the 3 reasons why your child doesn’t talk to you. Analyze if your family relationship presents any of them.
1. You demand too much or too little of him
As a parent, you don’t know them all, and although your child is getting to know the world, you should give him the opportunity to contribute ideas. Listen and support him . It doesn’t matter if he fails, if he falls he has to learn to get up. He will be happy to see that you were supporting him when he fell and giving him strength when he got up.
Of course, it is important that it be his own experience, for something that he himself invented. Let him be creative and analyze this:
– You talk too much : If your child does not usually express himself because he is an introvert, you should stop to spend time with him and wait for him to express himself. Be patient because any misstep will cause it to close again. You will have to be alone with him and in silence.
On the other hand, if your child is an extrovert, you will have to activate your engines and talk more. Go ahead and try to follow his rhythm to see him happy and little by little he will see that he can trust you to tell you things.
– When you ask questions , let them be open questions. You will see that this will eliminate the reasons why your child does not talk to you. But do not interrupt, ask the questions and wait patiently, until he answers.
2. You are not listening to your child
Some parents want to know everything about their children, but are also unwilling to hear the full story. . If, for example, your child’s teacher called to tell you that he hit another child and then your child admits to doing so, don’t rush to yell at him . Wait patiently for him to tell you why he did it, no matter how serious the situation.
He is innocent until proven otherwise, but to prove it he allows himself to defend himself: it is his right as a human being. If not, you are going to make the mistake that will lead your son to fear you instead of respecting you because he knows that you are always going to question his decisions.
If that happens, you will notice that this will end up being the reason why your child does not talk to you and when he decides to talk to you, he lies to you. That is why it is better to listen to him and when you have done it, show him the importance of sincerity and show him why what he did was wrong (if that is the case).
3. You draw hasty conclusions
Sometimes parents jump to conclusions instead of asking more questions until they are completely out of the question. Have you heard that parents also act as psychologists? That’s true, you have to ask questions until you are sure what your child is thinking.
“How does it make you feel?” or “What do you think about that decision?” These simple questions will help you understand the reasons for their behavior. A) Yes you will learn to see through your child’s eyes and it will be much easier to converse with him . But for this you must consider the following:
– You are distracted: Your child may be willing to talk, but it is you who has not caught the signals because it seems you are very busy. It may also be that your child is already tired of competing against your phone or your computer for your attention.
– Technology may have also become a reason why your child does not talk to you . When you talk to him, put your cell phone away. Especially when you see your child coming home, coming back from school or work.
– If you see that you are really busy, reschedule everything and tell him: “I want to give you my full attention.” Do what you have to do and immediately give it all your weather to your son.
As you can see, when your child does not talk to you most of the time it is because you have created some barrier. Analyze what it is and change it. It is never too late, even if your child is a teenager or an adult.