Why The Second Son Is More Disobedient Than The First
Although it is not an insurmountable rule, younger children are more likely to be less disciplined and obedient than the older sibling. Let’s see why.
When we are mothers for the second time, we may believe that the second son is a bit naughtier than first born and this often makes us wonder what are the reasons why this is so.
To begin with, to make a statement of this nature in an absolute way is a mistake, since each family it’s different and of course all children are not the same.
We have heard it said that each child is a universe, and there is nothing more true than this. We adults also preserve that innate difference that makes us individuals .
But there is one more element that we must take into account. The way each child acts is influenced by the environment in which he operates . In other words, if there are other children in the family, the age at which they are attending kindergarten for the first time, who is the adult in charge of taking care of them – their parents, grandparents or a babysitter – or if there are optimal spaces available for them. recreation.
Parents versus children
In short, there are several circumstances that will help to delineate the child’s personality. And among them, there is one that stands out strongly above the rest: the treatment that parents give to each child.
Parents vehemently assure that the parenting guidelines have been the same with each of our children , but seen from the outside there are certain variables that are perceived in its proper dimension by the smallest of the house. What are we talking about?
Parents feel more relaxed with the second child than with the first. When we are new to the complicated task of parenting, Mom and Dad are more attentive to every step of the child, with the aim of attending to all their needs and ensuring their safety.
Overprotection
The little ones tend to outnumber their older siblings in character, mischief, and inventions.
But sometimes, we cross the fine line of caution and end up being over-protective parents who become the child’s shadow. In fact, we frequently photograph and film the little one, to document every moment that turns out to be a great novelty for us : the first word, his first fruit, his first walk, just to mention a few.
With the second son we stopped having the camera at hand all day. Documenting each of your steps is no longer a priority. Time and attention should be divided between two children in an equanimous way, and in this we do put all our effort, even though we surely fail.
The path traveled with the older one helps us to allow the little one to create a small space for action that will give them more freedom. With respect to the older brother, and undoubtedly by feeling more sure of himself, he will be more daring and will dare to experience more things.
Parents tend to be less strict with younger children.
In fact, Scientific studies carried out in Europe and America coincide in the hypothesis that the second child is usually more irreverent and adventurous . He grows up with a different notion of what rules and discipline are, so it will seek to open space among the other members of the family.
It is not that we care less about the second child, but it does open a small gap that is used by him to handle himself with a freedom that the first-born did not enjoy.
Following in the footsteps of the eldest son
The easiest way to learn is through example. It doesn’t matter how many times you tell a child to get off the furniture, not to litter the walls, or not to throw food on the floor.
If the little one sees that the older one does these mischiefs, he will repeat them as normal and may even overcome his brother’s audacity , whom you may see as your main contender for parental attention.
Seen like this, if the oldest writes his name on a wall, the youngest will scribble his name and additionally draw a landscape that covers the entire wall, in order to make a difference.
As if that were not enough, the youngest appreciates their condition of being the smallest. You will know from the beginning that everyone around you – including the older brother they treat him with a sweetness and flexibility, which make him feel like the king or queen of the house. And this will be enough to grant you the license to do things your way.
